Sunday, November 16, 2008

Holy Mother of God!

If God was campaigning, I wouldn’t be, like, the church’s first choice for secretary of the state. Hell, I wouldn’t even be spokesperson or media relations manager or anything. The reason COULD be cos I use words like the one that the previous sentence began with. Or because I do things like wear my “evil“ tee-shirt to my cousin’s first holy communion. Or tell the priest blankly that I was forced to attend the retreat by the overzealous nuns at St. Teresa’s and all that. So this post is something of a surprise to me as well.

Well this church I go to’s in this hospital where you actually need a miracle to save you. I mean every time someone I knew went to that hospital, the doctors just managed to get it all screwed up. I was born there. Need I say more? it’s this Christian hospital and all…so you have white and blue decked statues of the Most Holy Virgin Mary, bedecked in the most unholy fashion with garish yellow plastic garlands, dotting every corner. It’s not a bad thing. Certainly not, considering the aptitude of the doctors out there, like I mentioned earlier. But I have to mention my pediatrician though he has nothing to do with the subject….he was a sweetheart, even if he gave me those dreadful injections (no, rabies was not one of them. The bitchiness manifested itself much, much later) okay so there are some good doctors, ok. Lord, I’m deviating here!! So about these statues… truth is I’ve been quite a fan of this Virgin Immaculate, Inviolate, Blessed Mary, Most Holy. And we’ know..friends…we do coffee sometimes. I drink the coffee..she’s got an image (and perfect skin)to keep up. Okay, so now you see why I’ve had such a crush on her for so long. I mean, all that mercy and kindness jazz really appealed to the cynic in me. She dint even have a lop-sided smile. FYI I’m talking about the crush little girls have on someone they want to grow up to be on-a-pedestal-idolise-pun-unintended-crush. Nothing from ‘queer dyke school’. (The pope would have such a fit, if it were otherwise). God, I’m like a drunk behind the wheel….weaving, weaving, weaving.

So these porcelain figures with their porcelain countenance(s) filled me with what I thought was piety. And my catholic trained arm ached to reach out to every one of them and place a kiss on her feet. (We’re quite the pagan, us Catholics. Have you even seen our church ceremonies?!?)

Let’s just get this over with, shall we. The point is, it seems that one particular statue cried tears of fragrant rose-scented oil. Did I believe it? I’m not sure. Am I that na├»ve? I guess. But nevertheless, after mass I went right over. And there she was, a tiny little unassuming statue, glorified (subject to opinion. Not in mine, certainly) in catholic kitsch. Someone had even stuck a shiny, sparkly, costume jewellery hairclip-like crown on her head. Her face had a I’ve-been-crying-rose-scented-oil look. I don’t know if it happened or not. If it’s a hoax or whatever. But I know one thing, it has given all these people something to believe in. It shook the routine in faith and hit the refresh button, you know what I’m saying. A little pizzazz, if I may say so.

They all come to church – devout, unquestioning, accepting, like reporting for duty. If there were an attendance register, we all know who’d be St. Peter’s darlings. But how many of them would dare to believe in a miracle. Not in the bible types, for turning to water to wine and walking on wine and seas separating on whim is all fine in the Old Testament and New Testament. It makes great bedtime story telling (tell me about it) but how many of them would tell their grandchildren about a miracle that happened in their lives? how many of them would invest hope in their faith, ask knowing they shall receive? All the same it was a good thing. Like I said, a refresh button. Faith Version 2.0 loading. As for me, all I can testify to was an overwhelming sense of peace. And I almost smelt the fragrance in the air.

P.S: this isn’t even what I wanted to talk about. But what the hell, I guess what should be said, finds a way to be heard.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

cookies for the jaded soul

10 pm.(in India) Running to stand still by u2 plays in the background while the wonderful consummation of Oreo cookies and cold milk warms both mouth and mind with chocolate edged sighs of absolute, uncontained pleasure. (These little black cookies with their pure white souls, oooh they're made in heaven.)

Truckloads of work, a very annoying and annoyed colleague are kept waiting on the flanks of recall (whatever that is) for my attention. As a matter of fact they clamour for it with a nail-scraping-against-the-wall quality of urgency. Like they even exist in my consecutive cookie universe!(read uninterrupted cookie universe, but I like the alliteration better)

Sin, black as white can be, softened by the moist hands of milk….mmmm…..

Didn’t someone, I forget who, say that it is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do? Well, amen to that.

p.s: this kind of philosophy I certainly can digest.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Untitled #1

It rolls under my


And goes to sleep like

an exhausted dog.

Oblivious to the

thieves that sneak

in and out of my mind.

Someone opens a

window but no

light filters in.

My heart heaves

Like the ocean

Filled with shipwrecks

and scarred by

storms. Invisible

lacerations that lurk

20 feet beneath

the surface.

Somewhere far away

Life honks its distant horn.

A container rumbling the earth

with its weight, somewhere

beyond the precincts of horizon.

Floating away.

A maroon island in sea blues.

I call it feeling sad.


Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Talkin about a Revolution

Obama Won!!!

O yeah

O wow

O cool

O baby

O right

And in true Mallu fashion …. O-some!!!

Sunday, November 2, 2008

If Jesus was a movie...

I just watched The Shawshank Redemption. And I’m telling you. There are two kinds of people in this world. Those who have seen The Shawshank Redemption and those who are yet to see The Shawshank Redemption. Those who will never see it in their lifetimes, they’re just going to have several more lifetimes until they see it. It’s part of the karma or dharma cycle. Which one I don’t know. I have NO CLUE why I took this long. I guess everything happens in its own time.(karma or dharma?)

But wow…what a movie. Honestly, WHAT A MOVIE!!

“Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things. And no good thing ever dies.”